Eulogy and Condolence Messages for Raymond Edward Horton, 2009
The Mass – Christian Burial, 2nd June 2009, St Agnes Catholic Church, Port Macquarie
Celebrant – Father Dennis Byrnes
Click here to access the Service Booklet
Apologies:
Dad’s brother – Len and his wife Janet, who are living in Victoria
Dad’s sister – Patricia (Sister of Mercy) Sydney
Overseas:
Dad’s son David, his wife Ann and their children Jane and Alex - USA
Dad’s daughter Marion (Mother Mary Claudia), Tyburn Monastery – Ireland
Daughter Jane her husband Paul, children Ben and Olivia – England
Eulogy - Delivered by Max Horton
Our Dad Raymond Edward Horton was born on 20th June 1920 in North Sydney and died on 27th May 2009, aged 88.
He was nicknamed Peter by the Earle Street Tennis Club at Cremorne, where he met Helen Margaret O’Brien (our Mum). Dad married Helen on 11th November 1948 at St Mary’s Cathedral Sydney, during his break as a chauffeur driver.
St Mary’s Cathedral
Mum said, “he was late”. Anyway, after the ceremony Dad and Mum went off for a cup of tea, but Dad had forgotten his money – so he ‘borrowed’ it from Mum. I don’t think Dad was ever late after that! So began married life!
The couple raised eleven children - 5 sons and 6 daughters, and the inevitable grandchildren and great grandchildren. And somehow Dad managed to squeeze in the odd game of golf!
Dad was the 5th child of nine to Walter (Wal) & Ellen (Nellie) Horton.
Nellie and Wal
Ray had a hard upbringing as a child, leaving school when he was 14 and with a poor attendance record. During the depression his dad’s business went bankrupt in North Sydney and they moved around. At one stage they were in Wollongong, where Dad worked in the Port Kembla steel mill – that work took a toll on his health.
Port Kembla Steelworks
During the war, Dad worked as a fitter and turner in an ammunitions factory. After the war, he put his hand to several positions: Taxi driver “I drive a million miles” he would say, chauffeur, truck and interstate transporter, the Snowy Mountains Scheme with his brother Ron doing tipper work (the old REO and Diamond T trucks) “good solid trucks but they were under powered for the job”, he would say.
In the late fifties Dad had a breakdown. After his treatment and recovery, the family (a relatively small number at that stage) moved to our property on Tallawong Road in Rouse Hill.
66 Tallawong Road, Rouse Hill
The recovery from Dad’s breakdown I put down to Mum - her patience, understanding and love, with assistance of the O’Brien and Horton families and their friends.
When Dad was in his 40s, he found an interest (apart from his growing family) in golf, which he loved, ‘to Mum’s relief’. He joined Castle Hill Country Club, his handicap dropped quickly and there were trophies galore. He went on to win the B Grade match play championship. The game, to this day I will not forget as I was Dad’s caddie. His opponent, a younger bigger and stronger hitter but Dad just wore him down with his consistency; his opponent by the 33rd hole was a wreck.
The B Grade Championship Board for 1971
All of us were encouraged to play the game, and Dad took great pride in its traditions – the etiquette and in the way each of us played. The same as in life itself.
Following a heart attack in the late 60’s (the first of several over the many years to follow), and his subsequent recovery he became known as ‘the comeback kid’.
The family, now at full capacity and with the older kids working, Dad was looking for some land, and up pops the Port Macquarie property - 25 acres of semi rainforest at Lake Innes. Lot 60 Lake Innes Drive was purchased and a few years later a new house was built by a good friend of Dad’s from his Castle Hill days. Mum was excited!
In 1978 the family moved in. Dad working on his pride and joy. Sheds being built, fencing, a new dam, a grotto, house extensions and carports all done over many years with the help of his sons and daughters. He devoted most of his time to maintaining and improving the family property. It was work steady and gradual, which he enjoyed.
During the construction stages of our Port home, Dad was still playing competition golf as a member of the local Port Macquarie Golf Club, winning the odd trophy or two until he retired from golf some years ago.
Until last year, he would still be moving soil with his old Howard 2000 tractor and trailer, a job he has done on and off for nearly 15 years with Pete’s help.
Dad’s religion was essential to him throughout his life. Sunday Mass and the daily Rosary was part of growing up in the Horton household. He taught the Catechism to the public-school children in the Port area, something he enjoyed.
Dad to me personally was highly intelligent, honest, generous, and loving in a Horton kind of way. His mind was always absorbing book after book on any subject - the ark, the saints, Roman and ancient history. Just to name some. Dad was a source of information.
If you were on the side veranda (having a quiet ale) and depending on what book Dad had just finished reading he would tell you all about it. These times I will always miss.
Now someone special - our Dad - has gone, but he will never be forgotten. Ray you are now with your best mate, Helen, and the memory of you will be with us forever.
To both of you – Ray and Helen, God bless and much love from us all.
Messages of Condolence
From Ray’s son David (USA)
Dad to me was an enigma, or perhaps a contradiction. He was talkative but he also liked the quiet. He would be working on projects or day-to-day tasks and yet he would seem to be bedridden for long periods. He was artistically gifted but didn’t continue to draw or paint. He was a firm taskmaster yet fair and caring.
But there was one thing I felt was not contradictory, and that was his sense of family. It was his belief that the family unit was sacrosanct and was not to be compromised by anyone or anything. It was that belief that stands out for me even to this day. His devotion to us and Mum while not necessarily overt was nonetheless steadfast.
The day I heard Dad had passed I gathered the family and went out to celebrate the life of a father and grandfather that had defied all the experts by living way longer than all expectations. I think God had blessed our family by allowing him to be with us much longer than nature intended. As we all talked about what we remembered about Dad, it’s always the pleasant or funny things that come to mind. So we talked, we smiled, we even laughed at times. I’m sure this would have been the way Dad would have liked to be remembered.
Whilst Dad may not have worn his heart on his sleeve, I always felt loved. And though the word was not one that crossed our lips, I felt it was understood. Now there is no doubt because he can read my heart.
Thank you for everything.
Your loving son, David
A Letter from Jenny Prior to Dad’s Passing - 26 November 2008
Hi Dad,
I thought it would be a good idea to write you a letter to say what I wanted to say, and a much easier way for me to communicate with you. I really enjoyed having spent time with you recently, though the time was much too short!
Dad, I want you to know, you have been a wonderful and inspiring person in my life. You have taught me to be strong in my faith and nurtured it by the beautiful stories of the life of our Lord and our Blessed Mother, the angels, and saints which I still to this day love to listen to and read about. Saying the rosary in front of our Sacred Heart picture every night was truly a family treasure.
I just loved being outdoors working with you and the boys on whatever job was on the go at the time, be it clearing the paddocks, pulling up stumps with the White or scouring the Timber yards for what you needed to build your next project. You loved to keep busy and were never afraid to have a go. What you have achieved at Lake Innes is amazing. The dam is looking pretty good after years of tender loving care. Everyone is very proud of you.
You took me to the zoo and to the airports to see the planes take off and land at Richmond and Mascot, which is always a thrill for a child. I was also your caddie for many years. You would take me to Royal Canberra, which was always my favourite, it is a beautiful course, though cold at Easter time! I looked forward to my packet of chips and squash at the end of the first nine to revive my energy. During my netball years, you and Mum came to support me a couple of times at the State Age Championships, which meant a lot to me, and inspired me to try harder.
Your contribution to my trip overseas was very unexpected and received most graciously, I sincerely thank-you, it helped a dream come true to see so many beautiful Holy places. Lourdes, Montmartre, Ars, and Rome to mention a few. Ah, Rome was truly a wonder. St Peter’s Basilica, to celebrate Mass in such surrounds is quite something, then to kneel at the tomb of St Peter himself with so many other Saints and Popes (John Paul II) nearby touches my heart. You, the family, relatives, and friends were very much in my prayers at those special times, that graces will flow through to all of us, especially during times of need. To see Pope Benedict XVI twice while we were there was a bonus. He is such a delight; we could almost touch him he was so close.
There are many more wonderful times I could write about, but I will finish this letter here to thank you for being my Dad. I love you.
Jenny
From Ray’s Daughter Jane (UK)
Dear Family
I am so sorry I cannot be there with you all to celebrate our father’s wonderful life but please be assured that I am with you all in spirit.
Thank you to you all for all you have done for Dad during his twilight years and recent illnesses. I know he would have been proud to have such wonderful loving sons and daughters surrounding him just as I am so proud to be your sister.
God bless our wonderful Dad.
Thinking of you all with love.
Jane
From Paul (Jane’s husband) and Their Children Ben, and Olivia (UK)
Paul, Ben, and Olivia would like to extend their sympathy to you all at the passing of your father Raymond. The three of us will remember him fondly even though most of our visits were brief.
Ray leaves behind a family of which he can be truly proud, and he is now reunited with his greatest love Helen and I am sure she is exceptionally pleased to see him. We will endeavour to see Jane through this sad time and will be thinking of you all on Tuesday 2nd June.
God bless Paul, Ben, and Olivia Myatt
This is for My Dad (unsigned)
An amazing, remarkable man
Whose example guides me,
Whose wisdom always points me in the right direction,
And whose love I carry with me through every turn in the road.
The things you have given me through the years of my life,
have been some of the most priceless gifts any person,
could have ever received.
And I thank you with all my heart for giving them to me.
Goodbye Dad - Unsigned
From Michael and Luke (Kalgoorlie)
We send all our love and prayers to all the family.
Wishing we could be there with you all.
Pop will always be remembered, and we thank him,
for many wonderful memories.
Pop will always be a ‘Legend’.
Love Always
Michael and Luke
Kalgoorlie, Western Australia
Created by the authors shown above, augmented and edited by Rob Landsberry, last updated 6 December, 2024